LOO AND VERNE'S NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS

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Loo and Vernes Girl Scout Cookie Diet

This morning one named Verne pulled out in front of me in her vehicle. After cleaning out the ditch, I gased it to catch up to her and sock her in the lips. On the highway I noticed these green boxes flying from her window. Upon further inspection these boxes were all empty, very early to be on a binge. So I continued to follow her until I lost the trail, later that evening I stopped by her house to discover her and cootie coyote having tea and cookies. Verne had a wild look in her eyes. I didn't know if it was the cookies or cootie.
So I rushed in and broke her royal Doulton tea pitcher and demanded to know why she caused me to clean out a ditch and why she was littering! Verne busted out in laughter, I was not amused and cootie was hiding under the couch, still speechless from the hot tea spilling on his lap.
What's so flipping funny?! I asked. To which Verne replied, I had a kidney stone and couldn't flush it. Last night I bought these new girl scout cookies made with cranberries. And you thought since they have cranberries somehow it would move the stone? Asked Loo.
Exactly! Only problem it didn't work but merely have me a case of dyspepsia and I was racing to Dr Harbolts. That still doesn't explain the littering. Dr Harbolt has a nose for unhealthy things so I was getting rid of the evidence. Lord knows I'm not sitting through one of his weight loss classes!
Sounds like you learned your lesson, so I won't punch you in the lips. Cootie you can come out now.